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Mail From: Rick Fedorchak <(email redacted)>

The Top 20 Cool Things About a Car that
Goes Faster than the Speed of Light

20 Sleep 'til noon. Still get to work by 8:00am!

19 Doppler shift makes red traffic lights look green.

18 Breaking laws of physics only a misdemeanor in most states.

17 Never in car long enough to hear an entire Madonna song.

16 Carl Sagan and Stephen Hawking keep bugging you to carpool.

15 No one can see you pick your nose while you drive.

14 Lunch breaks in Paris, circa 1792.

13 LA to Vegas in 2 nanoseconds.

12 You can stop worrying about being sucked into a black
hole driving home from work.

11 You'll be so thin while driving it you can even wear
horizontal stripes.

10 That deer in your headlights is actually behind you.

9 Kid from Mentos commercial almost guaranteed to lose
a limb if he tries to duck through back seat.

8 Traffic enforcement limited to cops with PhD's in Quantum Physics.

7 Bugs never see you comin'.

6 You can get to the good hookers before Charlie Sheen.

5 Can make a fortune delivering pizza with the slogan
"It's there before you order or it's free!"

4 Car makes it from Hollywood to London fast enough to
not arouse suspicions of Elizabeth Hurley.

3 License plate: "Me=mc2"

2 Cigarette butts don't land in the backseat -- they land in last week!

and the Number 1 Cool Thing About a Car that
Goes Faster than the Speed of Light...

1 Chicks dig it.